Anal 101: The Top 8 Basics
“You know, I think we should try the back-door tonight, honey…”
If you have referenced the “back door,” “entering in the rear,” or analingus, and been met with wild eyes or intrigue, you are probably conversing about and considering anal sex! There are some basic things that anyone thinking of trying this method of pleasure and enlightenment should know before taking the plunge.
*Even if you are monogamous, use a condom. Condoms help prevent the spread of bacteria around the genitalia, and any other body parts involved. Remember, even with a condom, it is never okay to “switch holes” mid-flight.
*Just like urinating after intercourse, having a bowel movement right after the deed is beneficial. In most cases, you will feel pressure and fullness that will make you feel like it is potty time anyway. Doing this ensures that the air bubbles, air pockets, and “butt farts” (even though they are not quite farts; maybe more like butt queefs) giving your anal areas more relief. You may have air releasing for hours after the act, and that is completely natural and normal.
*The first few times you have anal sex, you will most likely panic and might feel like you are having an accident. The key is to stay relaxed, have a conversation with your partner before the act begins so you both know what to expect, and learn a little about the human body’s anatomy. Internally, we have an external and internal sphincter. When humans have a bowel movement, those work together to empty the colon. When the brain sends mixed signals; pleasure or poo? The internal sphincter does not open normally sensing the changes. The chances of you actually pooping on yourself is slim, although always possible.
*Most often, the tip is the “hardest” part to endure. The tip is often the widest part of the penis, which makes it the hardest part to penetrate inside the anal canal. Once the tip is in, most report an ease of pressure, and finally being able to feel the “pleasure” people refer to during anal sex.
*Use the right lube! USE LUBE!! Using the right lube for anal sex is more important than choosing the right lube for vaginal sex! These days, many people swear by coconut oil and Crisco, however, you should be aware that these food grade oils are not condom safe. Using a thick, silicone or specifically made-for-anal-sex lube is key, and will help with the penetration issues that may arise. Anal tissues are sensitive and delicate. It does not take much to tear these tissues, and “going in dry,” or not using the proper lubrication can lead to fiction tears, bacteria growth, and infections. Here's the Best Anal Lubes
*Best positions for anal! The best beginner positions are reported to be Doggie-Style, Side-by-Side with backside penetration, and laying on your back with your legs spread and over your head. Of course this is different for everyone, and you should discuss with your partner what is best for all involved.
*Yes, it will most likely hurt. In a study done by Indiana professor Doctor D. Herbenick, they found that 70 percent of women reported pain in their first few sessions of anal sex. It was not until they were comfortable with their partner and the act itself where pain lessened, and all found pleasure. Ease the pain with these Desensitizing Lubes
*Don’t “make” yourself do it just for someone else. Because this is such a delicate area, being too tense, unprepared, or scared can actually hinder the ability to find any pleasure in this act, and can cause physical injury. If you are not comfortable with anal, that is okay! There are a LOT of other intimate and sexual acts you can try!
Whenever, wherever or however you decided to take on anal sex, just remember to listen to your body, and take it slowly until you master the how-to’s of it all. If you are still feeling unsure, seek out advice from a friends, doctors, or local sexual education educators and staff. Once all of the details are worked out, learned, and you are comfortable, anal sex can be insanely pleasuring for all involved!