Anal Play & Lubrication
As if anal sex wasn’t a hard enough topic to reach with your partner in general, now you’ve got questions about which lube is the best for this style of sex! Anal intercourse and sexual play have been around since the beginning of time, and society has always taken a quiet interest in how it all works. Truth is, anal is only slightly more complicated than vaginal intercourse, and even less so if you have a bottle of the right kind of lube to assist!
As humans, our anal canals do not self-lubricate like the tissues in the vagina do, and because we are adding in a bit of friction, an extra barrier is very much needed for comfort and safety. Anal tissues are delicate, easy to tear and injure, and very sensitive. Giving our bodies this extra layer of protection will only cause more good and pleasure-seeking feelings to come. The most common complaints during anal sex are the discomfort from dryness and the after-sex build-up of air. That said, not all lubes are created equal, and some are better than others when it comes to anal sex!
Water based lubricants are great for vaginal intercourse, and perfect to use with toys; but it is not the best choice for anal sex. Silicone lubricants are thicker and do not soak in to the body tissues as water based lube does. This allows the skin to have a nice, thick slippery barrier to ensure skin is not chafed, torn, or broken. Another type of lubrication that many are discussing in these days of naturals and organics is coconut oil. Cold-pressed, extra virgin and natural works on everything from your hair to your skin, and it is true that it can help re-hydrate and moisten the skin. This oil has also been known to clog genital pores, breakdown condoms and latex, and causes irritation, however.
There are a myriad of styles of silicone lubricant, some made specifically for anal sex. Those are the lubes you’re looking for! Certain anal lubes also have a desensitizer in them, or a variety of desensitizers that can be applied before the act takes place. (Desensitizers are used to take the initial “sting” from penetration out of the equation, or at least lessen it.) Not all anal lubrication has a number or desensitizer in them. During your first attempts at anal, you should be able to feel most all that is going on. You and your body need to know how things feel so you know what you want to avoid, feel less, or feel more. Some lubes are plain, cooling, tingling, or warming; depending on your likes, there is sure to be something that will fit your needs.
There are simple ways to incorporate lube in to your sexual drills, beginning at the beginning, of course. If using fingers to tease the area, it is best to wear a glove or finger condoms slathered in lube before insertion. Anal play should always begin with something no bigger than your own pinky finger! The anal region takes time, patience, and “training” to adequately handle regular anal sex. If you have a toy to use during anal play, be cautious about which lubes you use. Silicone lube cannot be used on silicone toys, and it causes warping, damage to the material, and the slow-and-untimely death of your toy. If using a toy, use a gel lubricant; which is not too much different from the thick silicone varieties. If you are preparing to lick, nibble or tease the area with your mouth, consider a lubricant that is flavored. Flavored lubricants tend to be avoided due to their high sugar content and possible skin reactions, but in this area these products are perfect. When you are ready to introduce a penis, be sure to lube well, be relaxed, and enjoy! The head is the widest part of the penis in most circumstances, so getting past the initial penetration will allow the pleasure to roll right in!
Whatever type of anal play or sex you are participating in, remember to be safe and be prepared with the correct type of lube. It is unnecessary to take such a great risk on our bodies when it is so simple to add in this wonderfully, slippery, silky barrier!